Screen Time at a High Level




Dear Friends,

If there’s one reverberant theme to parenting in the 21st century, it’s our collective concern about screen time and the effect it’s having on our kids. Inevitably, the subject comes up while we’re talking with friends over dinner, at a school function, or even on a hike. We know the many benefits of technology and that our childrens’ futures will require digital proficiency, but we want to be well-prepared to guide our kids into the digital world.  

Parenting Technology’ is enormously challenging, and often we aren’t sure quite where to begin. Here we’ve broken down the labyrinthine maze of parental checkpoints and have compiled all the resources needed to get on the right path.

With our Gold Star Collection, we’ve delved into the full spectrum of issues, from ‘Is Screen Time Addictive’ to ‘What’s the right amount of time’? Best Practices zeroes in on effective strategies for managing screen time for your family, and Our Guides shows you how to implement them.

Recognizing that every family has differing values and individual needs, our goal is to provide you with a personalised roadmap for navigating screen time. We can also present you with customized solutions for your specific needs, free of judgment and free of hassle. Ultimately, we are all in this digital experiment together and want Our Friends to know that they always have back up.

We’re here to help at any point — just text us at: 8-HIFAF-GOT-U!

With Best Wishes,



Julie Paul, Founder

The Key Takeaways

Screen Time is materially altering personal relationships.

Between Friends: teens now prefer texting to spending time together in-person.*

  • 55% of teens don’t put their phones away when hanging out with friends, and 44% of teens are annoyed about this. 

Between Parents and Kids: screens are creating a new level of tension that was non-existent 10 years ago

  • One-third of families report screen-related conflicts daily
  • Parents are finding the magnetic pull of these devices difficult to manage

The easy access to personal devices is reshaping how we enjoy media, making it a more individualized and less social experience. Snubbing someone to look at your cell phone, known as ‘phubbing,’ is clearly straining relationships.

* This is a major shift in just the last 5 years.

There’s a major community effect.

While families have differing perspectives about technology use, the impact is not contained to their own children, but affects the broader community when:

  • Parents give their kids devices without setting parental controls, and explicit content gets shared between schoolmates
  • The dynamics of social situations get awkward when some parents allow devices and others do not
Schools compound the problem when they:
  • Introduce technology into the classroom and home without adequately informing and preparing parents
  • Permit children to use phones during school hours reinforcing:
    • the new norm to socialize online rather than in-person during breaks
    • the distractions and the inclination to feel tethered to their phones

Schools need to join with parents in establishing firm boundaries with programs like ‘Away for the Day‘.

Parents are unclear how to strike the right balance.
  • The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) no longer recommends specific time limits for screen time and instead advises that children over 6:
    • Make sure there’s enough time for sleep, physical activity, unstructured play, and face-to-face interaction
    • Keep devices out of bedrooms, especially at night
    • Turn off screens 60 minutes prior to bedtime

Parents often don’t know how to balance the educational aspects of screen time and the entertainment factor, what tools are available to help them, and where to begin.

Screen time actually increases well-being up to a point
  • Kids who get moderate amounts of screen time are happier than peers who get too much or too little
  • The happiest teens are those with:
    • below average social media use
    • above average face-to-face communication
  • The least happy teens spend more than 20 hours per week on screens
Teens feel pressure to be ‘On’ all the time, and they themselves worry about their screen time use.
  • Nine out of ten teens think that spending too much time online is a problem facing their generation
  • 50% say they feel addicted to their phones, and more than half  of teens have intentionally tried to cut back
  • 72% of teens feeling the need to respond immediately to text and social media message

It’s no wonder that teens have elevated levels of anxiety and are driven to distraction.

Apple has finally revamped its parental controls. 

Screen Time gives parents more control over their children’s device use with the ability to:

  • Schedule Downtime to shut the phone off
  • Set time limits both for specific apps and app categories

While a huge improvement, there’s still a learning curve to set it up, and some major flaws render Screen Time useless for savvy kids. We hope that Apple will continue to rise to the occasion when investors and parents them accountable.

While our kids may be the digital natives, we need to flip the message that they’re the experts and take the lead.
  • Our goal is to send our kids out into the world with the ability to self-regulate and control their technology use rather than be controlled by it
  • Our role is to guide our children through the major inflection points, from their first iPad to when they start posting on social media

‘Parenting Technology’ is a lot easier when we know what we’re handing our children and are prepared to help them manage it.

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©2019 Heard It From A Friend

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